Someone's Gonna Get Busted
Last night was one of the most unusual nights our family has experienced.
We all got to bed on time and early.
We were startled awake by a loud knocking at our front door.
The dogs, of course, began barking incessantly and going all kinds of crazy.
Audrey, of course, woke up and began crying. Poor girl had no idea what was going on.
Tim and I had no clue either. We were running around the bedroom trying to find our clothes and see who the hell was at the door. It was 2:45am for god don don! I quickly darted in Audrey's room and told her I would be right back and everything was okay.
I race out into the living room a step behind Tim. The dogs are still barking their heads off, Audrey's still crying and I see a flashlight's beam bounce off the walls.
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. POLICE!
Tim shouts, "Hold on!" (We were rounding up the dogs so that we could lock them in the room and safely open the door.)
Finally, we answer the door (dogs still barking, Audrey still crying).
Officer: Is this, uh, such and such address?
Us: Yes.
Officer: Well, obviously you are not who we're looking for. We're looking for a black man.
Me: Well, what's his name? We just recently bought the house. Maybe we've received mail for him.
Officer: So and so common as can be name.
Me: No, never seen anything with his name on it.
Officer: Sorry to bother you. We'll let them know that you are the residents so you won't be bothered again.
(All this time...yes, dogs still barking and Audrey still crying her fluffy head off.)
Me: (Sleep deprived, cranky, pregnant and feeling it) Come here. Let me strangle you. I'll give you a reason to arrest me.
Needless to say, he didn't even crack a smile.
Turns out, there was a SWAT team surrounding our house. Looking at out the window, after rescuing Audrey, I saw 3 cop cars slowly take off.
I dried Audrey's tears and brought her into our bed. She lay there for a moment and then said, "There was someone knocking on our door with a flashlight."
"Yes, " Tim and I confirm in sleepy unison.
"He was gonna bust somebody!" says Audrey.
We just about died laughing, hearing that phrase in her tiny voice. (She'd obviously been listening intently to our conversations after the event.)
She talked and asked questions for about an hour.
I don't know when we all feel asleep, exactly. What I do know is that we all slept through the alarm and were late for work.
We all got to bed on time and early.
We were startled awake by a loud knocking at our front door.
The dogs, of course, began barking incessantly and going all kinds of crazy.
Audrey, of course, woke up and began crying. Poor girl had no idea what was going on.
Tim and I had no clue either. We were running around the bedroom trying to find our clothes and see who the hell was at the door. It was 2:45am for god don don! I quickly darted in Audrey's room and told her I would be right back and everything was okay.
I race out into the living room a step behind Tim. The dogs are still barking their heads off, Audrey's still crying and I see a flashlight's beam bounce off the walls.
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. POLICE!
Tim shouts, "Hold on!" (We were rounding up the dogs so that we could lock them in the room and safely open the door.)
Finally, we answer the door (dogs still barking, Audrey still crying).
Officer: Is this, uh, such and such address?
Us: Yes.
Officer: Well, obviously you are not who we're looking for. We're looking for a black man.
Me: Well, what's his name? We just recently bought the house. Maybe we've received mail for him.
Officer: So and so common as can be name.
Me: No, never seen anything with his name on it.
Officer: Sorry to bother you. We'll let them know that you are the residents so you won't be bothered again.
(All this time...yes, dogs still barking and Audrey still crying her fluffy head off.)
Me: (Sleep deprived, cranky, pregnant and feeling it) Come here. Let me strangle you. I'll give you a reason to arrest me.
Needless to say, he didn't even crack a smile.
Turns out, there was a SWAT team surrounding our house. Looking at out the window, after rescuing Audrey, I saw 3 cop cars slowly take off.
I dried Audrey's tears and brought her into our bed. She lay there for a moment and then said, "There was someone knocking on our door with a flashlight."
"Yes, " Tim and I confirm in sleepy unison.
"He was gonna bust somebody!" says Audrey.
We just about died laughing, hearing that phrase in her tiny voice. (She'd obviously been listening intently to our conversations after the event.)
She talked and asked questions for about an hour.
I don't know when we all feel asleep, exactly. What I do know is that we all slept through the alarm and were late for work.
5 Comments:
dude. wow! one morning a couple of months ago i was awakened (at a far more reasonable hour) by a couple of federal marshals. (one of whom was strapped, yo.) they asked me some questions about my neighbor but wouldn't tell me why. and i thought that was a good story.
did you really say that to the cop? i love you.
LOL at audrey!
i really said that to the cop.
(i'm lucky he DIDN'T arrest me, i guess.)
i love you, too.
That is just freakin' surreal.
And nutzo!
I thought the punchline was just gonna be the sheriff trying to serve someone, the SWAT team is WAY better story!
didn't you move to get away from that kind of stuff? :-)
So - you guys are still free people right? No blogging going on so either the kid(s) are taking up your energy or you are all in the hoosegow...
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